Thursday, October 31, 2024

The Artman Diaries

 Chapter 1: Rex

Artman Diaries Chapter 1: Rex

It was a putrid color.  A mixture of swamp green and yellow puss oozing from his eye.  I had seen this color before in horror movies like The Exorcist, The Swamp Thing or The Walking Dead but I just didn’t expect to see it this morning up close and personal.  I couldn’t see his eyeball but the substance that came from the corner of his eye was definitely visible.

Our love affair started just a mere year prior before when I got a call from a friend of mine that owned a local horse rescue farm.  “Hey, do you want to buy a horse that is going to the kill pen?  The guy that’s driving him said he would release him for only $800 which is the cost they would give him at the slaughterhouse.”  How did everyone know I have a deep moral obligation to save as many horses from the kill pen as possible.  Who saw when I was passing lonely, thin, neglected horses that I murmured “Its okay” to them as a tear fell down my cheek.  “Don’t you have any room at your place?” I replied to her.  She came back with a sorrowful “no” and I immediately replied, “Let me talk to Ray and I will get back with you.”

I hung up the phone and knew that I could persuade him to give him the right opportunity to present itself.  Ray was in the bathroom as he is six to eight times a day.  He has suffered from IBS, irritable bowl syndrome, for the last 20 years but has never done anything to fix it.  I came in casually and held my breath.  I don’t usually visit him in the bathroom as the air is as polluted as a New York subway, but I felt like I had a captured audience, so I took my chance.  “Hi honey, how are you?” and before he could answer I pounced like a puma in the desert landscape.  “Shelley just called and told me about another rescue she may get today.” He turned to look up at me but only with his eyes.  His head remained forward as if still looking at the phone.  “You have got to be kidding me.  You’re thinking about another rescue?  Don’t we have enough to do with the other 3 rescues out there?  Not to mention the cost! What did you tell her?”  I whipped out my phone and showed him a picture of the old horse galloping in a pen.  He had a saddle on so we couldn’t see the extent of his neglect.  I could see it in Rays eyes and his demeanor as he was coming up with more reasons why another 1200lb pet would be a bad idea.  I interrupted his chain of thought and said “We can ride together!  This is our chance to have 2 horses and gallop away in the sunset like the old Western movies!”  [he watched western movies and television shows on a regular basis] and with that he replied “Let me get done with the paperwork and you get the horse trailer ready.  Why do I let you talk me into these things?”  In which my response was “I love you so much honey!” and I ran toward the door grabbing the keys to the old Ford my dad passed down to me along with the farmland where the horses were to stay.

We arrived within 30 minutes, and I was searching for the old guy.  She had said he was malnourished but not to the point of being a skeleton.  My husband and I both gasped “wow” at the same time.  Here was this very tall horse with skin covering his bones.  If you would look at him from the back end, he looked like one of those Holstein cows.  I never knew a horse could be so thin.  His head hung low, and his eyes were big.  It was like he knew he had just made it free but had no energy left to fight with.  I went up to him and looked at him squarely in his big, brown eyes and said “It’s okay buddy.  We are going to take you home”. And that is just what we did.

He didn’t say much on his arrival to anything as the new scenery astounded him tremendously.  We had large trees in the yard that hung over the grass.  He was taking it all in when all of a sudden he heard “auuukkkkk” followed by several other squawks of help from the back yard, to on the hay shed, to in the back of the truck.  It sounded much like an air raid, and he had no idea what was making such a ruckus and startled quite a bit upon exiting the trailer.  “What is wrong with him?” Ray asked with a louder tone than usual.  “It’s just the peacocks, I don’t ever think he has seen one before.”

I assured the old guy that the peacocks were more scared of him than he is of them.  He didn’t believe me and kept cocking his head up high.  I led him through the gate to where Reba and Mack were.  Reba is our miniature and she is a mare.  She is the boss and even our young 2-year-old gelding knows this.  The old guy comes in and smells her and her ears, the whole 2 inches of them, become flattened on her head.  He knew the pecking order instantly and bolted away.

“What should we call him?” I asked Ray quizzically.  “Well, we named Mack after Reba for MacIntire. How about we see what her husband or boyfriends name is?” and I whipped out my phone to type the country singers name in the search engine.  “It says here her boyfriends name is Rex.  That sounds good to me.” And so, from then on he was called Rex.